There’s a side to working with kids that rarely makes the training manuals or coaching clinics.
It’s not about strategies, standards, or subject matter. It’s not about the X’s and O’s of practice plans, the details of a syllabus, or the bullet points on a resume.
It’s about something far simpler.
Far more human.
Far more important.
It’s about presence.
It’s about witnessing.
It’s about being the one who claps—even when no one else does.
Teaching is What We Do. Witnessing is Who We Are.
When you work with kids—whether as a teacher, coach, counselor, mentor, or parent—people assume your job is to educate, to instruct, to impart knowledge or build skills.
And that’s true. To an extent.
But the deeper work? The lasting work? It’s found in your presence.
It’s found in the quiet, unseen moments when a kid looks over their shoulder to see if someone—anyone—noticed what they just did.
Did someone see me get up after falling?
Did someone catch the fact that I showed up early today to help set up chairs?
Did anyone notice I finally spoke up in class, even though I hate public speaking?
Did anyone care that I stayed after practice to work on something because I want to get better?
Those moments matter.
They don’t show up on a scoreboard or report card. But they shape a young person’s sense of identity and self-worth. And if no one witnesses those moments, the kid begins to wonder: Does it even matter?
But if you see it—if you clap for it—they’ll remember it forever.
The Power of Presence
Being the one who claps isn’t about over-the-top praise or giving out participation trophies. It’s about genuine, intentional presence. It’s about being aware.
It means locking in on the small victories, the brave steps, the acts of quiet courage that often go unseen. It means celebrating effort, not just outcomes.
And make no mistake: kids know who’s watching.
They know who shows up to their games.
They know which teachers come to the school play.
They know who reads their writing and gives real feedback, not just a grade.
They know which coaches take time to check in outside of practice.
And when they know someone is paying attention—not just to what they produce, but to who they’re becoming—they begin to believe that they matter.
That belief? That’s the foundation of confidence. Of resilience. Of growth.
Clap When No One Else Does
There will be moments where you’re the only one clapping.
You’ll feel it in your bones—when the gym is half-empty, the kid stumbles through their lines on stage, or they finish dead last in the race.
But if you clap, you give them dignity.
You tell them: “You’re worth showing up for.”
And here’s the truth—they may never tell you that it meant something. They may not smile. They may not even look your way. But they’ll remember. In a world that often rushes past them, you paused. You saw them. And they’ll carry that with them—sometimes for the rest of their lives.
Why It Matters Now More Than Ever
Today’s kids are growing up in a world filled with pressure, noise, and comparison. Social media constantly shows them highlight reels and filters, while schools and sports can unintentionally turn every experience into a performance or competition.
What they need more than ever isn’t another evaluator.
They need witnesses.
They need encouragers.
They need leaders who will clap in the quiet moments.
You don’t have to be the best coach or the most brilliant teacher.
You just have to be there.
And when you show up consistently, with your eyes open and your heart engaged—you become a difference-maker in ways that can’t be measured.
So to every coach staying late to talk with a player…
To every teacher cheering in the back row at the talent show…
To every mentor sending a text after a tough loss…
To every parent clapping for a C+ that used to be an F…
You’re doing sacred work.
Keep showing up.
Keep clapping.
Even if you’re the only one.
Especially if you’re the only one.
It matters.
The Impact of a Silent Applause
There’s a moment I’ll never forget. A quiet kid on one of my teams who barely spoke all season finally got in a race. He didn’t win. In fact, he was dead last. But he finished. And when he touched the wall, he looked up to see if anyone noticed. There weren’t many people paying attention.
But I clapped. Just me.
Later that day, he came up and said, "Thanks for clapping for me. That meant a lot." That’s it. Just a sentence. But in that sentence lived the full weight of why we do what we do.
We never know what that moment of recognition means. But we know it matters.
The Invisible Work
In youth development, much of our most important work happens out of view. It happens in the margins. It happens in the spaces between the major milestones.
The 7 AM practice when the kid shows up despite being exhausted.
The group project where a student takes initiative for the first time.
The quiet apology made after a disagreement.
The moment a young athlete cheers on a teammate instead of sulking about their own result.
These moments won’t be captured on camera or written into their bios. But these are the moments. These are the defining moments.
And they need to be seen. Not necessarily celebrated with balloons and banners—just seen. Just noticed. Just clapped for.
The Long-Term Payoff
When we consistently show up for kids in these small ways, something incredible happens over time. Their belief in themselves expands. They start to believe they are seen and that they matter. And this has ripple effects that go far beyond the field, the pool, or the classroom.
They take more risks.
They try new things.
They start showing up for others.
Because when you’ve been witnessed with compassion and care, you begin to witness others with the same.
They become the next generation of clappers. And that’s how culture changes.
How to Build a Culture of Witnessing
So how do we do it more intentionally? How do we create environments where being the one who claps is the norm, not the exception?
Start with Attention
Be fully present. Put the phone down. Make eye contact. Observe.Acknowledge the Effort
Praise process over product. Let them know you see the hard work, not just the result.Name the Moment
Be specific: "I saw how you helped clean up without being asked." That clarity reinforces the value of the action.Model It Publicly
Clap. Literally. When a kid takes a risk, support them loudly and without hesitation.Train Others to Join You
Build leadership within your team or class by encouraging kids to clap for each other. Make it part of your culture.
Final Thoughts
Presence is underrated. But it’s the foundation of all meaningful work with young people.
They may forget your lessons. They may outgrow your drills or assignments. But they will never forget how it felt to be seen.
Be the one who claps.
Because it’s not just about applause. It’s about acknowledgment. It’s about affirmation. It’s about love, disguised as a simple gesture.
And it changes lives.